Without Words
by LavenderIceCream
Summary: Oneshot. Soumegu. What would happen if Megumi was expelled from Totsuki even after all of her efforts, blood and tears? Souma confronts her. warning: slight ooc


A/N: This was a Soumegu fic that I wrote a while back on Tumblr, but the-fallenempire recommended that I post it up on this website too so here it is~

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It didn't take long for her to pack up what little she had at Polar Star Dormitory. There really was nothing except notebooks, stationary, and her dear photo of home. _I'm coming home guys… though not how I wanted to,_ Megumi thought sadly, eyes darkening. She traced the familiar contour of her mother before carefully placing the photo in her bag.

The sun had set, and her room was washed with fading scarlet. The fiery red melted into that shadow gray before black. Down stairs was eerily quiet, marked with only murmurs. _Around now, Yuri-chan or Isshiki-senpai would've called me for dinner but I guess… they know. They all know._ Megumi bit her lips as a sudden wave of fierce frustration welled in her chest. The room felt like it was collapsing, her heart felt like it was twisting, and her throat felt like it was crumpling. _Just like my dream, just like my dream, I'm a failure just like my dream. Why, why did I ever even think I could be-?!_

Megumi burst out of her room, flung herself downstairs, and shot past the shocked Yuki out the door. Her feet raced somewhere, anywhere, as though the ground was aflame and she couldn't touch it. But she had to go. She had to go.

When her feet finally dragged to a halt, Megumi had no clue where she was except that she was in the forest outside the dorm. Her knees were scratched, her nails were dirt-filled, and her uniform was wrinkled and torn. … _But none of it matters anymore. Not anymore, not when I don't belong here_ , Megumi thought. A bizarre euphoria swelled within her, and a smile lit her face. _Actually, I never belonged here! Never; when did you ever think you were worthy of being here, Megumi? When, hmm? When did you get so full of yourself to think you could actually cook?_ Megumi gave a flat laugh, and clapped her hands lightly. _I'm worthless, and I wasted everyone's hopes at home. I'm an utter disappointment and-_

Slap! Megumi flinched as pain scorched through her hands. The back of her clasped hands stung. "Ow…?"

"Don't say anymore of that."

Megumi blinked, her mouth ajar in blank shock. All she could register was the harsh, hard anger glimmering in the gold eyes before her.

 _Souma-kun…_ "… What do you mean?" Megumi said, eyes wide. "I d-didn't say-"

"You _said_ … No, you won't make me say what you just said about yourself." Souma glared at her, a look that nearly seared her. "How dare you say that about yourself."

Megumi numbly realized that she must've been talking aloud. A part of her berated herself for carelessly talking. The other part began to be consumed with the euphoria again.

"It doesn't matter," she said harshly, and Souma stared. "It doesn't matter; I can say whatever I want about myself and I'm free to do so. It's true anyway. I am a failure."

"No. You're not free to say what you want about yourself. Or to think that about yourself." He crossed his arms.

"You can't control how I think!" Megumi said incredulously.

"I can't. But you can. Because you think it's okay to hurt yourself. Because you think it's alright to hate yourself. But it's not."

"I can hate whomever I'd like, especially myself. It won't hurt anyone but me," Megumi said bitterly. "No one has to know, and if I just keep up a mask, then no one will worry and no one will be hurt."

"You're just looking for someone to pity you!" Souma hissed. "You can't even see that people _are_ hurt when you're hurt, but even more so when you lie to them! Hurting yourself is the same as hurting other people!"

"No one should care about someone like me then! Why are you here?!" Megumi cried, her heart nearly splintering apart. "Why did you have to follow me…?" Hot tears blazed down her cheeks like wildfire through a forest; they left a stark trail leaving no doubt.

"Because… because you're you, and I love you for who you are…!" Souma waved his hands helplessly, before he at last slumped and brought a hand up to his face. "I'm in love with you, but I couldn't help you. I couldn't do anything. I…" He gritted his teeth.

"How could you…l… l-love someone like me?" Megumi whispered. "There's nothing good about me-"

"That's not true!" Souma jerked his head back up and stared into her eyes. "You're kind. You understand everyone around you. You're selfless, to the point of fault, and… I fell in love with you, because… it was you. And nobody else."

"That… that…"

"So… someone out there is hurt when you hurt yourself. _I_ 'm hurt. It's painful, more than if someone said that to me. It hurts. It hurts…"

His words slammed into her, and her heart ached.

"Then what do I do?" Megumi whispered desperately. "I don't know how to not hate myself-"

Her eyes widened as he folded his arms around her and held her. Megumi's heart began to race, and her mouth dried. She began to shake, but the arms only pulled her tighter against him.

"S-"

"I'll teach you how to love yourself."

At that, something broke inside Tadokoro Megumi. The tears streamed down as she buried her face in Souma's chest. The warm smell of him enveloped her like a wool blanket, like chamomile tea, like, like…

Like something she couldn't describe. _Is this what love is?_ she mused distantly.

"Yes," Souma said softly, murmuring into her ear. "It is."


End file.
